Dori will be in the hospital for the next day or so at least. She was scheduled to have her PICC line removed and a new medi-port put in tomorrow. But they will not do surgery on her with an infection. Today the nurse did take out her PICC line and its back to an old fashioned IV for dear old Dori. She will probably get a new PICC line soon but it will be at least a month before she can do any surgery. Dori tells me that there has been a positive ID for gram negative rods. I've done a lot of research on this and I'm real confused, I think it is so type of bacteria but I'm it still remains a big mystery to me. I do know that was one thing she had the last time she was in the hospital. Either she has picked it up again or the anti-biotics she took did not wipe it out completely. Its a bit ironic that they found the rods in the blood sample she took last Friday as a prep for her (now canceled) surgery. If you will remeber it took a long time to ID the source of infection last time because it take days to grow from a blood sample. But there was plenty of time between Friday and today for the rods to be visible. The good thing about that is that we know the source of the infection and can hopefully get it wiped out this time.
The kids had a great time at Aunt Kerri's today and we're all thankful for Uncle Joel coming over last night on a moments notice to watch the kids. You know you are loved when you can call at 11PM on a Wednesday night and find someone to come over and watch your kids all night.
Its 2AM do you know where Dori is? In the hospital..again. We were having a great night, by 8:30 the kids were both sleeping, all snug in their beds, with visions of a healthy Mom dancing in their heads. Dori and I were going to watch a movie since I didn’t have any work to do and she was feeling really good. But about 45 minutes into the movie she starts shaking and has pain in her legs. She takes her temp and it is over 102. She’s feeling really cold so she takes a hot bath and takes her temp again and its still up there. She begs me not to go to the hospital but I take her anyway. My brother, God bless him, comes over in case the kids wakeup (this is at 11pm). We go to the ER and by 2am they decide that Dori is not coming home tonight. So there you go, all the news is up to date.
There are a lot of thoughts that you think about driving back from the hospital at 2am, the one that keeps coming back to me is what will my kids say in the morning when they wake up and learn that Mom is in the hospital again? Jaden is too young to miss her too much or really understand but Tait is probably going to be upset. I also think about that saying that “if it don’t kill you it will make you stronger”. Which makes me feel like Tait will be one strong dude when he is older. And of course what is it like for Dori to be back in the hospital? She doesn’t ever complain but I know its tough on her. I think Dori would say “welcome to the life of a cancer patient”. And just make the best of it.
I’m also reminded of just how much I love my wife and how lucky I am to have her. She’s everything you could ask for in a person and there is so much to learn from her life experience. When we got married I could have never imagined all the changes and trials we would go through and how we could continue to grow and love each other more despite everything that happens (and maybe some of it is because of what has happened).
Anyway I am rambling so I’ll get some sleep. BTW, if you have never been to the ER late at night it is worth a trip if only for the great stories you get to hear. My favorite line of the night heard across the thin blue curtain was………”she will never get them legs fixed, you should see what that doc did to her tits!” You know how hard it is to laugh without making a sound? Dori and I do.
posted by Dori at 02:43 AM | bookmark this | (4)
any comments?
Wednesday, July 21, 2004
A day in the life
I sure am ready to get this PICC line out. I had a meltdown on Monday. i went to give yet another doctor yet another sample of my blood. I had just run the same tests last Friday for a different doctor, why they can't comunicate with one another i will never know. Anyway...they wanted to stick my arm for blood and i asked them to use my line which easily draws blood and saves me a stick in my arm. i know its really no big deal to the average person to get stuck once a year but i get stuck just a little more often and will avoid a needle if at all possible. (makes sense because i have this tube hanging out of my vein already) The technician said "i can't use that line because i am not a nurse but you can go over to the hospital next door and they can do it." (please keep in mind i am accompanied by my 2 year old and 7 year old) So we trek over to the hospital and of course the hospital needed new orders to do the procedure so we waited. The lady checking us into the hospital said "can't we just stick you?" i lost it. i said "do you like to be stuck with needles? why do i have this line if no one is going to use it? you have no idea what my life is like so just get on the phone and call my surgeon to get the needed paper work. " Of course i had started to cry and Tait had crawled in my lap telling me it was going to be ok. i had to wait again for a nurse to come to the lab to do the 45 second procedure but i had my blood drawn through my picc line and i felt much better after my meltdown. Such is a day in the life of a cancer patient.
what to do next? We had a great weekend with extended family. My sister and brother in law are expecting their first baby in September and i got to be part of a baby shower for them. The food was great and the company even better! Though life is going on, my thoughts keep turning to the right thing to do to fight my cancer now that i am free of infection. I have met various specialists about the increasing tumors in my liver. None of the procedures sound like something i want to do because they are rough on the body and come with no guarentees. i wish it were as simple as "you're gall bladder is causing all these problems and we need to remove it and all will be ok." Dr. Kapoor has about talked me out of the radiation procedures and it wouldn't take much to talk me out of anything causing more pain or illness. He says if it aint broke, why fix it? So you see, i have two 6 centimeter tumors in my liver but i have normal liver function. He says we need to worry about the entire body right now, not just the liver. i have one more week to decide. This Friday i will have a new mediport placed on the left side and have my PICC line removed. (clap, clap, clap!) Next week will be decision time.
posted by Dori at 02:41 PM | bookmark this | (5)
any comments?
